Negative feedback is an inevitable part of life. Research shows that people who are better at handling negative feedback tend to be more successful. A study by Leadership IQ found that 46% of newly hired employees fail within 18 months. Of those who fail, 26% do so because they can’t accept feedback.
We need feedback, good or bad, to stretch and grow. Mark Murphy, author of Hiring for Attitude says that high performers are often high performers specifically because they’re good at accepting feedback; they use it as fuel for personal growth. If we are resistant to feedback it usually means we are resistant to change.
Three tips for giving and receiving feedback:
Prepare yourself for the good, the bad, and the ugly.
Even when you don’t expect negative feedback, prepare for it: imagine the worst-case scenario. we sometimes make assumptions that we are taking the right course of action only to find out we missed the mark by a lot. This can put ourselves and others affected on the defensive.
Take a step back and focus on the facts.
This will assist you to process your emotions while analyzing the feedback. Although the person providing feedback may be emotional, you control how you receive and process the information. Self-control is a skill that leaders develop and it sees them through the toughest situations, so the first time we are surprised by unexpected news or results is the beginning of that learning journey.
Be confident.
It’s hard to imagine being confident when feedback strikes a nerve. High performers look for feedback, knowing that it is important to their growth. Murphy states, “They understand that the feedback they’re getting is not an indictment of them personally.” They quickly learn that confidence grows when you take risks and embrace opportunity. You can stay safe in the shadows and avoid feedback, but if you want to learn and grow it means you eventually have to move into the light. It takes confidence to do that.
Feedback is important for all leaders, because as Murphy puts it: “Nobody who’s doing anything worthwhile is going to skate through a situation without feedback.” Learning how to accept feedback and use it to your advantage takes practice. Whatever the case, it’s a worthwhile exercise that will support you throughout your life.
Perception-based survey tools are a powerful way to allow many people to share feedback – with you and/or your organization. Check out our variety of feedback tools here.